In 2007, the wonderful Jackson posted a blog titled How To Be Happy. And I thought it was awesome. I’ve decided to prepare my own version in light of the things I’ve been thinking and feeling lately. Here it is: my formula for happy.
1. Every night before sleep, muse on all the great stuff in your life
I am well fed, have a loving family, supportive friends and generally see the good in everything. I see this as cause for a personal party in my head every night before bed. And sure, like most, I’m also known to fall prey to that old dog self-comparison and sometimes wonder why so-and-so has it so much better/easier/sweeter than me. But that’s only 20 per cent of the time and I can live with that. This evening, I’m grateful for a nice email I received earlier today, daylight savings allowing me to walk home under a sky of blue, and the kick-ass leftover jambalaya I had for dinner.
2. Stretch after waking
This feels so good and is a speedy way to kick-start each day.
3. Be bold!
Despite how difficult I find this, I can usually rummage up the guts to compliment people on things I like about them. It’s particularly challenging to compliment a near stranger, but doing so feels great! Past examples include: “Hey! I really like the way you tell jokes”; “I love how readily you come up with solutions”; “You’re so open and willing to share”. Is it bad that I might enjoy giving compliments more than the receivers?
4. Cook your own meals
Nothing helps me unwind more than making ingredient lists, chopping vegetables, experimenting with spices, setting the oven timer and scooping something steamy onto a plate. Nourishing yourself with homemade grub (Aussie slang for food) is absolutely ace. Sure, sometimes recipes (or my methods) fail me, but the next attempt is always better.
5. Clean. Get rid of useless crap
Less is best, I say.
6. Stop second-guessing what others think of you
I do this. A lot. My derailed train of thought sometimes comes up with crazies like, “Such-and-such thinks you’re a total fool!”; “That person on the train just looked at you a little funny. There’s probably a less mobile person on the train who needs your seat. That person thinks you’re selfish!”. Whether or not these imaginings are true is utterly irrelevant. You know you’re a good person, with good intentions. These unhelpful thoughts that sometimes creep in do not serve you, so dump ‘em and be on your way.
7. Serve others
I believe I first stumbled on this wisdom while listening to a priest deliver his homily, and I remember lingering over the idea for a while afterwards. How nice, don’t you think? To make it your business to seek out ways to help your peeps (ie your fellow humans). Figuring out ways I can be of service to others – holding a door open, listening to someone’s worries, walking a friend home – has given me so much to be happy about. I like to picture a world where we’ve all got each other’s backs.
8. Joke. Laugh. Tease. Poke fun. Show off.
If you ask me, silly is a one-way path to happy. It’s inside all of us. It doesn’t die when you hit the double digits. I still love a good fart joke, tap people on the shoulder then duck as they turn to see who it is, and make up the bestest nonsensical songs about my boyfriend. Silly is the quality I most admire in others.
9. Blog often
I’m Gen-Y, so sue me! Seriously, though, my wee contributions to SuperForest have cranked my happiness meter to new heights. I think it’s something to do with feeling part of a really incredible group of folks, plus feeling part of a wider, global community thanks to the interaction I’ve had with all you SuperForesters around the world who I may never meet face-to-face. Blogging here gives me a sense that I have a place, that my issues are the same as yours, that we dream the same dreams.
10. If you’re fortunate enough to have both your parents around, show ‘em lots of love
Only as an adult have I realised how much this means to parents, to be shown love by their kids. Growing up, my parents both noticed something lacking in me, and would urge me to “use my heart more”. Though I was incredibly defensive and upset at first, I soon took onboard their advice and have learnt how this is done. My old man was diagnosed with lung cancer just last month. He’s in great spirits and despite how scary it all is, I’m hopeful he will be okay. It makes me happy knowing that if something does happen, he knows how much he is loved.
Please share your own personal how-tos for happy in the comments. I’d love to hear about them.
April
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